A name is never 'just' a name, it's unlike any other word. When you give something, or someone a name, you're forming part of an identity, making an impression that s forever associated with that name.
When I was about ten years old one of our class projects at school involved asking our parents why they had chosen the names they'd given us. I remember how, when asked, my classmates replied with a number of reasons... some were named by following family tradition, such as being named after a Grandparent, others were named after somebody important to their parents, or after famous people, writers, actors, singers, or legends, whether real or mythical. They all had names that meant something of significance, even if it was just the fact that the name appealed to whoever chose it. Then it was my turn.
"My Mum chose the name Jayne because it couldn't be shortened, and spelt it with a y so it would be different.".
My answer was met with silence, followed by a few sniggers, rapidly increasing to uncontrolled hilarity. The irony being that Jayne/Jane wa probably the popular girls name of my generation! I grew up amongst a myriad of Ja(y)nes, each one seemed to merge into the rest, plain Ja(y)nes!
So that's how I felt about myself throughout my life, nothing special, just Jayne, blending in, inconspicuous. Until now!
Now, I've claimed a name from my ancestry, one that has a meaning, a connection, a grounding.
My Mother's middle name is the name of her paternal Grandmother, my Father's middle name is that of his paternal Grandfather. My middle name should, therefore, have been Violet, after my paternal Grandmother, and I'd have chosen to use Violet instead of Jayne.
Violet would never have blended in -the name may have seemed old-fashioned, but it suited me, A traditional,sometimes overlooked and under-estimated flower, but overcoming the cold of Winter and popping up to bloom, determinedly and unexpectedly in early Spring. Cherished and appreciated for being there.
So now I claim not only my rightful name, my heritage and my permission to escape the mundane and step into the person I am meant to be - I am Violet!